Reconnecting
My husband, 11-year-old son and I are now in week eight of quarantine, which continues to present new challenges every day. But as I mentioned in my previous posts, there are also distinct advantages – one of which is finding the time to catch up with old friends and family.
Partner Cues
While I always enjoyed making friends and maintaining those relationships, I’ve spent the last 15 years taking a master class by watching my husband, Don. When we first started dating, I couldn’t keep all of his friends straight; there were so many! I recall being both surprised and delighted when he made time to call, email or text friends he’d met in elementary-, middle- and high school, college, and in summer beach houses. He’s always enjoyed keeping track of everyone’s birthday and using it as the perfect reason to pick up the phone to call friends all over the world. You should know that when Don refers to a “new” friend, he’s referring to someone he met in college - which is both funny and enviable at the same time.
Before Don and I were married, I also had a large circle of friends from childhood, high school and college. But once I became a full-time working mom, it became much harder to keep in touch with everyone – which is something I regret.
Now that my life has slowed down due to the pandemic, I’ve been back in touch with friends and family and seen them more often than I have in many years. Like so many others around the world, I’ve enjoyed wonderful happy hours on Zoom and even some old-fashioned phone calls.
Listening Closely
This may sound odd, but I’ve a completely new appreciation for the sound of a friend’s or a family member’s voice on the phone. There’s something so intimate and powerful about a loved-one’s voice. If you listen closely, you can hear their happiness, sadness and even their exhaustion. During these past 8 weeks, I’ve been back in touch with old friends and family to chat about their lives, their children, spouses and parents. We’ve also traded resources for fresh produce, mediation, virtual yoga, online learning, TV shows and so much more.
As I mentioned in my last blog post, our 11-year-old son, Jordan has High Functioning Autism – which for him means that peer-to-peer socialization is a challenge. But as an only child quarantined with his mom and dad for two months, he has grown to crave interaction with kids his age. As a result, Jordan has reached beyond his comfort zone to contact his buddies using FaceTime or phone calls. Once these conversations are over, he always smiles brightly and says it was great to catch up.
Although nothing has really changed for Don, who continues to chat with his friends (both old and new), Jordan and I have learned a few valuable lessons about the importance of staying connected.
Mid-Year Resolution
Yes, I know that life will resume and my schedule will become hectic again. But I’ve promised myself to carve out time to stay in touch with those special people who make my life richer. I’ve been reminded of their intelligence, their humor and their thoughtfulness and I’m not willing to miss out ever again.
How have your relationships with family and friends changed since being shuttered at home?